Chief Problems Returns

Featured Image

Players

Squidge

Jay

Chief

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Content Warning

There are a couple of references to reproduction in this episode. The first is at 19:16, when Chief says:

Chief:

You know, the blue ones who can have sex with anybody

And after that, Squidge says the following at 42:52

Squidge:

The bonus of having sex on the back of a unicorn

Please listen responsibly.

Show Notes

You can tell that we’re back with another episode because it starts with Squidge letting out a really loud burp

sorry listeners

but that didn’t stop Jay from introducing the show and the hosts. This is important because

CHIEF HAS RETURNED

That’s right, Chief has returned. The last time Chief was on an episode was WAY back in January of 2020

on an episode called Agent QTE

And in traditional style, Squidge welcomed Chief back with open arms:

Squidge:

It is nice that you’ve brought your cannon round. I don’t know how you got it through the front door.

Recent Games

The Recent Games segment will not be new to listeners, but in case you’re new to the show here’s how it goes: we go round the table and discuss one or more games that we’ve been playing recently, and whether we think it’s worth the listeners checking it out. We continue to do this until we’ve run out of games to discuss.

Jay:

I love to hear what everyone’s been playing, and whether they would recommend it.

Because it had been over a year since Chief’s last appearance, we didn’t want to know about every game that he’d played recently. Listing them all would take a long time, so we asked him to discuss three or four of the games that he had played most recently.

But before we got to that, we asked Chief whether he’d like to go do the Thunder Plains - without telling him what that meant

Chief:

This sounds like a pyramid scheme."Just sign your name here, but we wont tell you what you’re gonna get"

To be fair, he might not be wrong. You’ll find out later in the episode…

It’s also worth noting that we record these episodes a little in advance

which you’re probably aware of anyway

In fact, here’s proof of when we recorded this episode:

Chief’s Recent Games

• Final Fantasy VII (2020)

This was released just as the world started to change, and Chief wasn’t able to talk with us about this release.

Fear not, dear listener/reader. We’ve discussed this title at length on the show already. Here are each of the episodes where Squidge and Lulu have talked about the FFVII remake, in the order that we’d recommend listening to them:

1. Final Fantasy VII Remake With Lulu - Part One
2. Final Fantasy VII Remake With Lulu - Part Two
3. Final Fantasy VII Remake With Lulu - Part Two
4. Final Fantasy VII Remake Reflections - Part 1
5. Final Fantasy VII Remake Reflections - Part 2
6. Final Fantasy VII Remake Reflections - Part 3

That’s almost 6 hours of us talking about the remake so far.

Wow!

• Horizon Zero Dawn
• Command & Conquer Remastered Collection
• Total War: ROME REMASTERED

Shocking almost no one in particular, two of Chief’s highlights are real time strategy/tactics games

for a quick 411 on what RTT and RTS games are, check out The Quantum What of What

• Wasteland 3
• Ghost of Tsushima

Two titles title which Chief has only played the beginning of.

• Final Fantasy X/X-2 HD Remaster

And Chief hasn’t been using any of the special commands/cheats which are included in the remaster, too.

Chief:

Final Fantasy X: good; Final Fantasy X-2: not good.

Squidge’s Recent Games

• Cyberpunk 2077
• Kingdom Hearts 2
• Castlevania Advance Collection

This contains (among others) Castlevania: Harmony of Dissonance and Castlevania: Circle of the Moon, and is hella fun to play - especially for MetroidVania fans.

• Mass Effect Legendary Edition

Squidge:

So I’ve probed Uranus

Jay’s Recent Games

• Mafia II: Definitive Edition

And that was about it, really. As he said, Jay doesn’t get a lot of time to play video games these days.

The Thunder Plain Games

For those who are new to the pod, we have a section called “Thunder Plain Games” which might be vaguely reminiscent of a certain programme on BBC Radio 4

but for copyright reasons, it is completely different

Imagine that you are in Final Fantasy X, and the Thunder Plains is a place that you get banished to. And what we’re going to do is we’re going to open a portal to the Thunder Plains and, very nicely and politely, boot you through it. You will get help, maybe it will be tomorrow, maybe it will be in a week, maybe it will be in an hour.

To stop you from getting bored, we’ve said that we’ll keep the portal open and we’ll throw through up to three video games and everything you need to play them - including an Internet connection. The only rules are that you can’t ask for help, because help is on the way, and you can’t tell anyone that you’re in the Thunder Plains.

So our question is: were we to do throw, boot, or yeet you through the portal, which games are we throwing through with you?

This time around, both Jay and Squidge all took part in the Thunder Plain Games

as they’ve never officially done this on the show

Jay’s Choices

• Streets of Rage

either the first, second, or fourth entry

• Peggle

Squidge’s Choices

• Resident Evil Gaiden
• Dark Chronicle

Chief’s Choices

• The Witcher 3
• Workers & Resources: Soviet Republic
• Final Fantasy XV

Chief:

I’m gonna take Final Fantasy XV through the Thunder Plain, to remind me how $h!* games can be, so that I can appreciate the other two more.

Subnautica and Reviewing Games

Chief wanted to tell us about the story of the person who reviewed Subnautica on Steam:

Chief:

He says that he hates Subnautica so much that he says, "Take the disc out. Crap on the disc. Then let the smell filter through, and then throw up on the disc." and that’s how much he hates Subnautica.

Which… well. Wow. That’s a review and a half.

And on the back of that, Jay started a conversation about it being fine for companies to release a product that you don’t like.

Jay:

If you don’t like it, then don’t buy it. It’s as simple as that folks.

Podcast Ideas

Continuing on from our most recent episode with Andrew Dickinson

here’s a link to our ideas in that episode

we had a number of podcast ideas in this episode, namely:

• Flash Cats; which is similar to Top Cat, but legally different from it in some way or other
• Legally Different; a show that is legally different from other things, because reasons
• The Democracy Using Examples From Children’s TV Podcast; … we’re as confused as you are
• Hot, Hard Bread Podcast; … nope

And In Closing

Chief:

And that’s a wrap.

It’s always good to help your friends to achieve their dreams.

External Links of Interest

• Support us on Ko-Fi
• Our Facebook page
• Us on Twitter
• Super Power, Spoony Bards, and Silverware - The Super Nintendo Entertainment System by Dominic Arsenault

Music

Links to the music used in the podcast can be found below. Definitely check them out, because they're amazing tracks by awesome musicians.

• Intro music is Among The Stars, from the Cosmos Music Pack by Muz Station Productions
• Spoiler Break music is Spectrum (Subdiffusion Mix) by Foniqz (BandCamp)
• Pallet Cleanser music is Breath Deep Breath Clear (Wu Chi) by Siobhan Dakay
• Funny Quirky Comedy by Redafs.com, Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License
• Thunder Plains - FFX OST © Square-Enix
• Film Noir Background Music for Videos, Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License
• Outro Music is I N e e d Y o u 私の側て by G.H (removed from BandCamp)